9 week 5 day scan

Another photo shoot for hippotapea today!

Our hippopotapea (or hippopoaprune as he is now) measured 10 weeks! And was waving little hands at us. hippopotapea then tried to eat a hand or two, and kicked their little legs  at me. It was all so cute, I melted with cuteness.

9 weeks 5 days, eating my hand


As you can see my little hippopotapea is clearly super cute.

So as he’s measuring 10 weeks, I’m no longer seeing Mr F at the clinic, he is sending me to another clinic with a specialist in Gestational Diabetes. He said he wants me to go there, in Liverpool until 20 weeks. I wanted to go to my local hospital, but he said he wasn’t sure if they could handle my early diabetes properly. It’s such a long way though, 1.5hours each way. I’m worried, but he tells me not to worry, and that it’ll be fine.

But in exactly 14 days Mr F does my cerclage, I’ll get one scan beforehand apparently to make sure little one is OK. Then it’s needle time.

When people ask me if I’m going on a honeymoon I don’t know what to say, I can’t say that I’m having a cerclage, since most people don’t know I’m pregnant and wouldn’t know what a cerclage was anyway. We try to say that we’re having a couple of days in Liverpool but that gets some seriously weird looks.

We passed by the local antique shop today and saw the cutest little rocking horse. I’ve always wanted a rocking horse for the nursery, but I never got round to getting one. And then there was that one, just sitting outside watching me. It was only £15 and I was so tempted to buy it, but I didn’t. What would I do with it if…? I’m still half and half about going and having a look at it though. Why couldn’t it be there in another 20 weeks?

Incidentally, I had a look at what people were searching for to find me. My top search term is not tiny glimmers, or Gideon, or PPROM, nope, it’s Gruffalo! Gruffalo? I make one post about the book and attract hundreds of people a week with the search term? In fact this is a list of people’s most searched terms to find me today.

gruffalo 66
the gruffalo 21
fibre 5
gruffalo images 4
gruffalo pic 2
gruffalo picture 2
gruffalo pictures 1
tiny glimmers 1
gruffalo books 1
gruffalo book 1
pictures of the gruffalo 1
gruffalò 1
gruffalo immagini

Hmm…very weird indeed.


Gestational Diabetes Already?

Yesterday I started to feel funky. Funky in a recognizable way, I remember feeling the exact same way last pregnancy around this time – 9 weeks. It’s headachey, misty vision and utter heavy drowsiness. I began to realise last time it was my sugar levels and so I bought a glucose tester and sure enough I was struggling to keep my levels normal. My doctor’s wouldn’t believe that I could get Gestational Diabetes (GD) that early, so they didn’t test until 24ish weeks, where I failed and ended up on insulin.

So, today, when I was really struggling to see anything, I found my tester, and an hour before dinner, like the instructions tell me, I tested. It was supposed to be 5.5, it wasn’t. It was 10.5, which is 189 in the US, and FAR too high. So, to follow up I tested for glucose in my urine and yep, I am excreting vast amounts of glucose and ketones.

Both pregnancies this has coincided with the approximate week when the placenta takes over, so interesting, but a pain, because I can’t exercise to lower the levels. I can just eat healthily, somehow, with my IBS, and see if I can avoid insulin. I might not be able to. I thought my metformin might help,  but it hasn’t. I’ll just not eat any more croissant or pain au chocolate (oops).

You might notice the interesting selection of medical items I have in my home. For this pregnancy I have

1) A blood glucose meter
2) Urine dip tests which test for white cells, protein, blood, nitrates, glucose and ketones. (So keeping an eye out for diabetes, infections and pre-eclampsia)
3) A blood pressure monitor
4) A foetal heart monitor (a doppler)

If I could have an ultrasound machine I would.  I prefer to keep an eye on my own health, professionals don’t seem to be as good at it. 😉



9 weeks 1 day

9 weeks. I have another scan on Tuesday, some days go really slowly, some go much faster. I’ve been eating a lot of antacids as I have bad heartburn (just like last time) and they give me a calcium boost in my non-dairy world.

The baby is now the size of a green olive apparently, but for a green olive, this baby sure likes to eat lots. Especially yoghurt, but since I’m allergic to milk I’m restricted to soya yoghurt, and that just isn’t good. I’m going to try and make an almond and hemp yoghurt, I’ll let you know how that goes.

In 15 days I’m getting married, which feels a bit surreal. But being pregnant is a bit surreal too, so I’ll just keep smiling in my surreal little world and see where that takes me.

This is what little button looks like in there, although not exactly, button is much cuter 😉


3 Weeks

I’m getting married in 3 weeks. I can’t believe how fast it’s come about, I can’t believe it at all. I wonder when it’ll feel like it’s really happening? On the day?

I feel so happy that my little button and my little Gideon will be with me on the day, even if I can’t see them in the traditional way, I know they’re there, I feel them.

It’s wedding, cerclage, bedrest and (hopefully) healthy baby. Come this time next year I hope I am writing about celebrating my 1 year wedding anniversary in 3 weeks, with my button in my arms.

That is the dream.


My Little PandaButton

He/She, (got to stop calling baby he lol) measured 7w4d, I’m 7w5d. Gideon measured one day smaller on his first scan too. PandaButton’s little heart was beating away, and he was standing on his head.

We rearranged the cerclage for the 10th July, I was afraid 9 weeks was too early. 10 July I’ll be 11w4d, which is much better.

I get another scan in 2 weeks. Yay!!

When they decided to take blood, I thought that if I didn’t mention my impossible veins, then the nurse would have no negative ideas about how hard this was going to be and it would be easier. This did not work and it took 5 nurses and 6 stabs to get any blood from me, they basically nearly gave up. That hurt a bit. But not unexpected.

The doctor said my progesterone was nice and high and all my clotting factors were just great. There is an nice big fluid filled cyst on my right hand ovary, which explains the pain I’ve been having, but the corpus luteum on my left has apparently wandered off. At first this was worrying, but I assume if there was a problem I would have started bleeding now.

I asked the doctor what would happen if my waters broke with a cerclage in, he said unless I showed signs of infection they would keep it in, but yes, there would be an infection risk. I had to know either way.

I’m very exhausted, but I did get myself an 18 carat wedding ring for £115 at the pawnbrokers!! Just so tired.

I have another scan in exactly 2 weeks. They have been really good about scanning me lots and often.

I loved seeing my beautiful button, it made me cry with happiness. It just…gives me that tiny little bit of hope I’ve been searching for since I said goodbye to my Gideon.

Scan Tomorrow

At last the day is dawning. Tomorrow is my scan. Clearly my anxiety is through the roof as my dreams are reflecting my fears.

After a whole night of dreaming about slow heartbeats on this scan, I also dreamt about this one coming early and dying. Of course it’s probably anxiety, and I know that. But my nightmares turned into reality last pregnancy, so I don’t trust them.

I don’t know what the scan will show tomorrow, but it’s going to be the longest wait! I hope to update here with good news tomorrow. Come on hippopotapea, show mummy how strong you are.

7 Weeks

Although time feels like it is creeping impossibly slowly, somehow I am 7 weeks today. That means it’s been 3.5 weeks since I got my first positive pregnancy test, can that be right? Can it be that long. I keep telling myself that in another 3.5 week I’ll be 10.5 weeks, which is a good number

The closer I get to the scan next Tuesday, the more afraid I am. I want to know, I don’t want to know, I just want everything to be OK, but I’m scared it isn’t. I keep trying to ‘sense’ if everything is OK, but my intuition pointlessly and cruelly abandons me during pregnancy. I discovered that last time, leaving me shocked when my water’s broke and horrified when Gideon died. Intuition? Nope, I have none of that to keep me company. Instead I constantly chat to my little Button and Gideon. I ask Gideon to watch over this little Button and I ask Button to hang on nice and strong inside me, until at least 37 weeks then to keep being strong outside.

Whether it’s strange for me to chatter away to my heaven-child and my unborn I don’t know. But it comforts me.

These are going to be the longest 5 days ever. This is just one of many hurdles (I hope) but it’s the first, get a scan, see a baby, find a heartbeat, with a nice healthy BPM.

This is what a 7 week baby looks like, except the size of a blueberry.

7 week baby

I prefer baby to fetus incidentally. And somehow I prefer this picture

7 weeks

Because it makes me chuckle, it looks like a teeny tiny baby hippopotamus. So we call Button Hippopotapea!